Both Hands Please
purveyor of smut and social commentary
Saturday 22 August 2015
A New Toy!
I've shared so little of late.. So, to inform you of my ongoing existence, I thought I'd show you my new toy. I'm well pleased with it's results.
What do you think dear readers?
Would you?
Tuesday 28 October 2014
You.
With motives
dark
a touch so
delicate
your words
inflict bruising with such eloquence.
It’s you.
You who peals
the bells that resonate beneath my skin
whose warm
praise wraps round my heart
opaque
rice paper
thin.
In you.
In you the landscape
of my desire is written
scrawled in
your hand.
Each shift of
weight, each ripple
every breath.
The
shuddering ones and the quiet.
As I retreat,
freefalling head first into fantasy
or lunge
forward, with scant regard into life unbridled
You have been
the anchor.
That which
keeps me moored.
Though tides
and wakes relentless break upon my shores
and swirl
forebodingly around the sun
it’s this
desire for you that crests
forever out
of reach
but always in
my view.
Timeless
and more.
You.
Saturday 24 May 2014
Hiatus
So, if you've been following this page for more than a year, you'll know that I tend to drop off the radar more often than not. I wish I could blame my idle hands for that. But it's quite the opposite.
You'll also be aware that I tend to come back with a slice of filth in order to appease and apologise.
This time will be no different. I offer no excuses. It just is.
If you care to place yourself beside me for a moment...
this picture was taken during the course of an epic 11 hour drive on my recent holiday.. I got particularly aroused, for no particular reason.
It was 41* and I needed some relief.
I really do wish you could have been there!
more soon?
Tuesday 25 February 2014
choice cuts #24...
'Haters'
by
LAW
(Lauren Holt)
A refreshingly innovative fusion of soul and hip hop the likes of which you are yet to hear, melting effortlessly into your eardrums. This girl has a voice, really has a voice. If you fancy a bit of trip-hop this will move you. Her debut EP is out for free download on soundcloud. A fascinating, entirely hypnotic live performer to boot.
Her previous single 'Hustle' is also brilliant. Listen.
'Haters'
by
LAW
(Lauren Holt)
A refreshingly innovative fusion of soul and hip hop the likes of which you are yet to hear, melting effortlessly into your eardrums. This girl has a voice, really has a voice. If you fancy a bit of trip-hop this will move you. Her debut EP is out for free download on soundcloud. A fascinating, entirely hypnotic live performer to boot.
Her previous single 'Hustle' is also brilliant. Listen.
Sunday 9 February 2014
i swear we are connected!
i was dreaming about you last night
strange dreams of water seeping through walls..
piercing heat..
oral sex, languid
on a creaking bed
and bottles of pills.
we were travelling, i don't know where.
it was all shutter vision
comic strip style
at one point, she walked in the room
contributing ribbons and breasts to an already lavish orgy.
who knows, perhaps i was tuning in to your drunken fantasy
through the ether,
your delicate
furtive touch
from across the oceans,
shackling me.
yes.
i'd like to see you too
Monday 27 January 2014
2013.....
ear to the ground
Ok.. so I'm decidedly late this time around, however, these here are my lists of top albums and tunes that have influenced and altered my state over the past 12 months.
Music (along with 'the road') is life. It's my constant companion. Surprisingly enough though, I don't own a pair of headphones. Music is everywhere and I want to hear it. The louder the better.
If but one of you finds a skerrick of love for any or all of the below, then I'll be happy in the knowledge that we share a passion. And I urge you to indulge along with me, at will.
In no particular order, these are my favourite recent offerings:
Nick Cave & the Bad Seeds - Push the Sky Away
Probably the greatest Alt Rock outfit that ever came out of Oz, perhaps even the planet. The overlord of darkness at his poetic finest, lead along merrily by the never ending enthusiasm of Mr.Ellis and the rest of the mad, bad bunch.
Factory Floor - Factory Floor
Smashing debut album that skirts around descriptions; this London trio knock out one of the most compelling, non-stop live shows I've ever had the privilege to witness. Dark, thumping beats & experimental noise that sends one back to the cradle.
Nadine Shah - Love Your Dum & Mad
Haunting and punchy themes are tackled by this Northern lass, singer/songwriter. Nadines voice alone has the chilling ability to reach inside, indiscriminately, and rip at anything it lays its gravelly tones upon.
Thee Oh Sees - Floating Coffin
Straight outta San Fran, yet another offering from perhaps the most prolific band in recent history. And they keep getting better. Rock at its psychedelic and punk best. One of the most memorable shows of 2013 without doubt.
La Femme - Psycho Tropical Berlin
Cold wave, synth heavy psychedelica out of France that transports you to warmer climes in order to invoke Hui and trip haphazardly along an endless summer. Live show coming up = happy bhp.
PVT - Homosapien
A superbly thoughtful and at times experimental offering from the Aussie rock trio now calling London home. The new direction works more than favourably from go to whoa, these lads have firmly found their feet.
Major Lazer - Free the Universe
The latest sublimely eclectic body of collaborative work from master Diplo et al. From reggae through ragga to dub step and beyond. Featuring probably my fave track of the year 'Get Free'.
London Grammar - If You Wait
A sensuous and brooding debut; Mellow and painfully beautiful trip-pop masterpiece that deserves a place in pretty much everyones music library. Good when alone, for driving, crying, and inspiring.
Savages - Silence Yourself
Debut offering from this all female rock quartet. A sometimes dark and disassociative body of work. Intense. Intelligent and pretty much lawless. Patti meets Siouxsie and go tripping together.
Arctic Monkeys - AM
Probably the best album release yet from the Sheffield lads. And that says about all it needs to. Indie rock legend status confirmed.
And now for a top ten track listing.... as usual I'll venture outside the above albums and their myriad of truly killer tracks in an attempt to bring another 10 artists into my loving light.
Again in no particular order:
These are the cream of the records that helped shape my year, 2013. Overall, I thought it was an outstanding year for releases. I'll be nodding my head, shuffling my feet, and throwing down shapes to this lot for a long time yet. Enjoy.
art by: ears
ear to the ground
Ok.. so I'm decidedly late this time around, however, these here are my lists of top albums and tunes that have influenced and altered my state over the past 12 months.
Music (along with 'the road') is life. It's my constant companion. Surprisingly enough though, I don't own a pair of headphones. Music is everywhere and I want to hear it. The louder the better.
If but one of you finds a skerrick of love for any or all of the below, then I'll be happy in the knowledge that we share a passion. And I urge you to indulge along with me, at will.
In no particular order, these are my favourite recent offerings:
Nick Cave & the Bad Seeds - Push the Sky Away
Probably the greatest Alt Rock outfit that ever came out of Oz, perhaps even the planet. The overlord of darkness at his poetic finest, lead along merrily by the never ending enthusiasm of Mr.Ellis and the rest of the mad, bad bunch.
Factory Floor - Factory Floor
Smashing debut album that skirts around descriptions; this London trio knock out one of the most compelling, non-stop live shows I've ever had the privilege to witness. Dark, thumping beats & experimental noise that sends one back to the cradle.
Nadine Shah - Love Your Dum & Mad
Haunting and punchy themes are tackled by this Northern lass, singer/songwriter. Nadines voice alone has the chilling ability to reach inside, indiscriminately, and rip at anything it lays its gravelly tones upon.
Thee Oh Sees - Floating Coffin
Straight outta San Fran, yet another offering from perhaps the most prolific band in recent history. And they keep getting better. Rock at its psychedelic and punk best. One of the most memorable shows of 2013 without doubt.
La Femme - Psycho Tropical Berlin
Cold wave, synth heavy psychedelica out of France that transports you to warmer climes in order to invoke Hui and trip haphazardly along an endless summer. Live show coming up = happy bhp.
PVT - Homosapien
A superbly thoughtful and at times experimental offering from the Aussie rock trio now calling London home. The new direction works more than favourably from go to whoa, these lads have firmly found their feet.
Major Lazer - Free the Universe
The latest sublimely eclectic body of collaborative work from master Diplo et al. From reggae through ragga to dub step and beyond. Featuring probably my fave track of the year 'Get Free'.
London Grammar - If You Wait
A sensuous and brooding debut; Mellow and painfully beautiful trip-pop masterpiece that deserves a place in pretty much everyones music library. Good when alone, for driving, crying, and inspiring.
Savages - Silence Yourself
Debut offering from this all female rock quartet. A sometimes dark and disassociative body of work. Intense. Intelligent and pretty much lawless. Patti meets Siouxsie and go tripping together.
Arctic Monkeys - AM
Probably the best album release yet from the Sheffield lads. And that says about all it needs to. Indie rock legend status confirmed.
And now for a top ten track listing.... as usual I'll venture outside the above albums and their myriad of truly killer tracks in an attempt to bring another 10 artists into my loving light.
Again in no particular order:
A Tooth For An Eye by The Knife
- trip-tronica at its experimental best. only in Sweden!!
What's Holding You by Lorelle Meets the Obsolete
- chunky, driving, psychedelica outta Mexico! Brilliant.
Chum by Earl Sweatshirt
- choicest of cuts off his latest collaborative hip hop album.
My God is the Sun by Queens of the Stone Age
- stellar tune from the lads has got to be right up there.
Stimulation by Disclosure
- one of the phattest tunes off their debut album. if you like beats.
Off & On by Findlay
- raw but beltingly good garage rock at its less than 3 minute best.
Out of the Black by Royal Blood
- powerful and grimey sound out of this Brighton duo.
Drone Logic by Daniel Avery
- it's like underworld shagged trentemoller..
Mozart's House by Clean Bandit
- another fresh and quirky stonker from the london fringes.
Way I Feel by Palace
- killer tune on high rotation at my gaf; distorted disco to move your bod.
art by: ears
Thursday 24 October 2013
Shadow puppetry of the penis
...after nipping off to my bedroom to furiously rub one out following some scintillating conversation with an incredibly gorgeous applicant for the spare room in our house, i couldn't help but notice and then fixate on, the shadow play upon my wall. i wish i could have held the camera still for the money shot, however i'm afraid my control doesn't stretch that far. i guess you had to be there...
Saturday 19 October 2013
a city doesn't always love you
As I navigate the adverse camber of a solitary
existence
and traverse the frosty crags of glacial failings and loves lost
a slow perpetual degradation leads me to a familiar, far reaching understanding..
There are some things better left unsaid.
Some things the boy in me need never
have seen, let alone known.
Curiosity, as it turns out, has a hefty price tag
of its own.
Experience, it’s been told, keeps a dear school
whose classrooms fill to
brim predominantly with fools.
As surely as springs melt finds its way to
shimmering sea
a fleeting glimpse at mirrors bevelled edge reveals
....the fool in me.
all images taken in the Nederlands by bhp
Friday 11 October 2013
BH.Plugs....
Pablo Delgado
If you’ve ever
spent a lazy afternoon wandering around the east end of London you would have
no doubt marvelled at the prevalence of some high quality street art. Yes there
is plenty of mindless dross and naff tags, but you don’t have to search far or
wide to be rewarded.
You do however,
need to look closely and most often down, if you want to spy some of the
extraordinary work of Senor Delgado. A
prolific paste-up artist brought to London’s grimy streets from the blazing
colour and sunshine of Mexico.
If you want to
appreciate his craft you need to get low to the ground, because Pablos creations
are miniature in stature but epic in substance. Often satirical, symbolic and
reflective of mankinds impact in and on the planet, his pieces quite joyously tread
on the toes of surrealism, and dabble in the darker recesses.
In a world
where bigger is better, more is de rigueur, where gigabytes are giving way to
terabytes, Delgado is seriously bucking
the trend and reminding us all of our place in the world, as drops in the
ocean, none more valuable than any other, pearls one and all.
When asked why
he feels the need to make his creations so small his response was...
“It’s a mix of things. We need to be less.
We are too many in the world and that small size is the opposite of the stupid
necessities and immense resources that we use. And we need to be discreet”
For me, London is a better place for having
this artist within its community. Not only does he reward the curiously
observant with some colour and sunshine in an otherwise dreary landscape, but
his tiny works promote much grander concepts.. his commentary as relevant to
the individual as they are to the entire city.
And beyond.
all works by Pablo Delgado
review by bhp
Thursday 10 October 2013
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